Who am I?

Mi foto
Not even I know who i am full well, but I will try to explain as well as i can what i do know. I am a girl. I fight depression, and social anxiety. More than anything I want to lose weight. This is my attempt to start over. Youll get to know me as you read the anectodes of my life.

viernes, 1 de febrero de 2013

Dreams and Flatmate hate

Well thats one exam done. 3 more to go.
Today I am in hiding. Its 1:33 pm as I write this and im locked up in my room. Last night I went to bed a little late, and also I went for a loooong walk with my flatmate M. , so that tired me out extra. Even so Ive been awake for several hours but I dont want the world to know that.
I havent updated anything or gone online on Yahoo or Steam so that even my boyfriend thinks im still asleep or very tired.
Or sick. 
I dont care, I just dont want to talk to anyone.
Im just sitting here listeing to music and thinking about how the scale seemes to be staring at me from across the room ...

My 2 kg weight gain which im not talking about hasnt gone unnoticed.
I saw my other flatmate, Fer, yesterday. I posted about her in the past and her lovely tactfulness. Here.
And in her usual way she commented on how I looked different.
"Oh right , I know what it is now, have you gained some weight?" 
Can I kill her please?
PLEASE?
ugh.
Ive decided not to eat for a year. Or ever. Again

Just you wach, I bet ill binge tomorrow.
Im so weak. 
At least shes not at the flat though. As her family lives an hour away and we havent started classes yet shes staying with her family and only coming over here on the exam days and leaving straight away. Suits me just fine. Becasue I really get on well with M. , my other flatmate. She is amazing ^^.
Though.
I had a disturbing dream about her last night.
Aparently I have a repressed wish to make out with her which I knew nothing about.
Well she is pretty hot
This is wierd
I think ill just go and work out for a while, and then have a shower.

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